The Night Dialer

Today I have been trying to think of the most embarrassing sleepwalking/talking adventure I have ever had.

There was the time I was in second grade that my new friend Chloe had asked me to sleepover. Chloe was probably a little surprised when I got up in the middle of the night, walked straight to her parents room, and climbed in bed with them. Then there was the time my male roommate, Brian, had a bunch of his guy friends over after I had already gone to bed. I ran into the living room (sound asleep) where they were all hanging out and just stood in the middle of the room staring at them with a petrified look on my face. I woke up after about 30 seconds of them asking if I was okay and what I needed. I then ran back to my bedroom without a word and locked myself in for the rest of the night! I’m sure Brian had to explain to his friends that I was his “very special roommate, Courtney.” So embarrassing!

These two stories combined do not come close to the utter humiliation I felt one night a few years ago. My boyfriend (not Isaac) and I had broken up and I was devastated. I have never been that torn up over a guy before. I would cry myself to sleep and start crying a few minutes after waking up, every day! It was a little ridiculous, especially for a guy who didn’t treat me well most of the time! I’ll change his name to Josh for this story. It had been two weeks since Josh and I had broken up and I went to bed feeling lonely and depressed. I must have dreamt that we got back together and things were fine between us because I reached over, dialed his number into the keypad, and called Josh in my sleep. Did I mention that Josh and I were not on speaking terms? Josh answered and it sounded like he was at a raging party, of course. I said “hey baby, I saw you just called me, whats up?” in the sweetest voice I could muster. Josh sounded sincerely confused and said “No Court, I didn’t just call you” I replied “Yeah, you did. I have a missed call from you on my phone. What are you up to?” I would not stop trying to make conversation with him and talking to him in a disgusting lovey-dovey voice.  Josh seemed to get extremely uncomfortable at this point and insisted that he did NOT call me. It was then that I fully woke up. I looked at the caller ID to see if this was really happening, and it was. I said quickly “Oh, sorry, must have been someone else” and hung up before he could say anything else. This was one of those situations where you are completely alone and STILL manage to turn bright red. My face was on fire for the next few minutes and I sat there terrified of my sleeping self! I felt so betrayed by my own brain and body! Josh and I didn’t speak again for several more months, making it all the more awkward.

Even retelling the story makes me cringe! I don’t know if he ever realized what had happened; for all I know he probably thought I was so psychotic that I decided to call him up at 2 am and pretend like everything was great between us.

You may be wondering how I can recall this entire story if I was asleep. That’s one of the weirdest parts about my sleep talking. Sometimes I remember every single detail. I can see myself doing these ridiculous acts in my sleep, but can’t stop. As soon as I wake up, I will remember everything that just happened and will become overwhelmed with embarrassment! Since then I have not made any more sleep-calls, and I hope not to!

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