The Things I Hear At Work

Working at a massage therapy and medical arts college has its perks. If I have a kink in my neck, there are about 30 people in the building who can fix it. If I need my blood pressure or temperature taken, I see the nurse three doors down from my office. If someone is having a life threatening emergency, we grab the nurse and the licensed EMT. Overall, it’s a pretty safe place to work.

The funny thing about my job is the things I hear waking down the hallway, in classrooms, and even sometimes say myself. They have become totally normal within our walls, but said in a different workplace/school environment, it would be a complete HR nightmare.

Some recent and common ones:

I need your hands on my body now

Please don’t stop rubbing me

Can I go in that room or are students naked?

Can I take your blood?

Someone is stealing pregnancy tests

Can you feel my stomach and see if it feels weird? (Said by me back when my hemorrhagic cyst was happening. It was my coworker who rubbed my belly and said “go to the doctor now”)

This morning in class I was being palpated and…

Stop talking I need to count your breaths per minute

Please undress to your level of comfort and lay down

I can’t wait for class so I can take a nap (okay maybe this is common at other colleges schools too)

Never a dull moment, that’s for sure!

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