Red Is The New Black

My recent allergic reaction has gotten MUCH better but has left me very red faced. Like you know when something EXTREMELY embarrassing happens and you turn 30 shades of red? That is me. Constantly. While it is still burning and very painful, the swelling is way better so for that I am thankful. I went back to my doctor today because the redness concerned me but she said I just need to be patient. Silly doctor, patience isn’t a prescription. She said she wouldn’t give me more steroids as that would only mask the problem and would set me up for a bad rebound. As frustrating as it is to just sit here in pain and wait, I’m thankful that she isn’t one of those doctors who just pumps me full of steroids and sends me on my way.

I’ve been surprised (not pleasantly) at some of the comments I’ve gotten regarding my appearance. People never cease to amaze me with their lack of tact.

“What’s wrong with your face?”

“You better get that mess (pointing to my face) figured out before your wedding or your pictures will look terrible!”

“You look like a raccoon”

“You look like you just spent a week in the sun without sunblock”

“Did you know that your face is red?”

And my personal favorite? When the same person walks by over and over again, makes a pouty lip, and points to my face. No words- just points, pouts, and walks by.

True, I’m going to be more sensitive to people’s comments because I’M the one dealing with the redness/pain, but saying things like “you better get that mess figured out” is uncalled for. I pray I have never said something so insensitive to someone who may be dealing with a physical or emotional issue, I’d like to think my social awareness is a little more fine tuned than that.

I’m considering making a press release to the general public. It would look something like this:

Folks,
Thank you for your concern regarding my face. To answer several of your questions, yes, I do know my face is red. I know this because I am one of those fortunate humans who owns a mirror. If by chance I skipped looking at myself in the mirror this morning, don’t you worry your pretty little head. I can literally feel the heat coming off of my face and the burning sensation is constant. Even talking and smiling hurts, so I am aware of the red.

Thank you for reminding me that my wedding is in 5 weeks and I am going to have thousands of photos taken of me. Can you believe it?? I haven’t even THOUGHT about the fact that one of the most important days of my life is in 5 weeks and I look like a cherry tomato. In case you missed it, that was sarcastic.

If you feel the overwhelming desire to relate me to an animal, please pick something sexy like a jaguar or an animal that at least makes sense given my appearance, like a flamingo or a red fox. A raccoon? What is this, amateur hour?

While I truly do appreciate the kind words and well wishes from friends and coworkers, the literal pointing and pouting is a little much. Shall I start pointing to your body parts that I disapprove of and frown like a little girl whose ice cream cone was just stolen from her fat little fingers? That game could get fun real quick!

Again, thank you to those of you who are genuinely interested in my well-being and health. I appreciate the support, kind smiles, and offers to help in any way possible. I don’t mind telling you “what is wrong with my face”, but maybe try asking it in a different way. A way that shows you have an ounce of tact and doesn’t make me want to hit you with the ginormous jug of moisturizer that has become more of an accessory to me lately than my dang purse.

Thank you,

Courtney

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28 thoughts on “Red Is The New Black

  1. HAHAH this is my favorite post of yours I’ve read so far.

    Seriously people!! It’ll get better in no time. I wanna read more about your wedding!!! Can’t wait.

    • Well thanks!! I can’t wait to look in the mirror and recognize myself. It’s a weird feeling to not really recognize the person staring back at you. I can see why people freak out when they get cosmetic surgery done!! Even if they look better after, it’s still weird.

      Wedding- YAY! It’s all coming together, slowly but surely. We are having it at a bed and breakfast in the mountains, most beautiful place ever! We are having a 200 person burrito bar (I am obsessed with Mexican food and Chipotle/Qdoba), and we have a ridiculously huge bridal party. I’m sure I’ll be posting tons of photos after the wedding, SO excited! …..as long as this dang face clears up lol.

  2. I can’t believe how insensitive people are! I’m sorry that this is happening… all of it. I am thinking about you lots (even though I don’t really know you) and I am sending all my positive “feel good” and “pretty” vibes to you for your wedding. These thoughts will most likely have the greatest effect in, oh, about 4.5-5 weeks. This giraffe loves ya!

    • It’s amazing, isn’t it?! Thank you so much for your words, they mean more than you know!!! I think I am slowly getting better, so in 5 weeks hopefully I’ll be back to normal. Or I’d just take a few levels better than this, no need to be TOTALLY fixed hahah!

      Thanks again!! ❤ ❤

  3. You’re showing an enormous amount of restraint in not handing out that very nice letter. Although I do think the pointing and pouting person does deserve a bit of a reciprocation.

    I’m sure in 5 weeks you’ll be fine, it seems like a pretty massive improvement since your initial post on the reaction. Nonetheless, feel better soon!!

    P.S. When I had a rash/reaction on my face I used vaseline and it not only felt amazing but helped clear it up. Not saying I’d recommend it on a large scale, but it might be something to look into?

    • Yes, yes it has taken a lot of restraint to not slap it on people’s foreheads haha! It is still continuing to heal so for that I am thankful!! The looks of pity are the worst. If I’m all cheery and happy, I wish people would stop pouting at me and reminding me what I look like haha! C’mon people, treat me like a human again!

      I have tried using some vaseline, didn’t go too well 😦 I saw a dermatologist this morning who said my immune system is in freak out mode b/c of the reaction so everything is going to make it react. How fun! My mom found some awesome face lotion though, it’s by First Aid Beauty from Sephora that really seems to be helping. Thank goodness!

      Thanks for your kind words and encouragement, I think I’ll be just fine in 5 weeks too! If not…then oh well. I will still be marrying the love of my life and that isn’t so bad, regardless of what I look like. 🙂

  4. I feel like there is always something I can relate to in your posts! I’ve never had to deal with the same allergy situation you are going through, but, I tend to be a bit accident prone…A few years ago, I tripped and landed flat on my face and had to get multiple stitches. My eyes were swollen and my face was stitched up, green and puffy…it looked like a mix between Quasimodo and Frankenstein. Unfortunately, the accident happened while I was on vacation, so I had show my face in public a lot more than I wanted to. The comments and stares from people made me want to write a letter like that, too! 😀

    • Oh I’m so glad you can relate! I write about a lot of random stuff so I love hearing that other people are dealing with the same feelings, even if they aren’t the exact same issues.

      That accident sounds AWFUL, you poor thing!!! I can only imagine the looks people gave you. How sad to have your vacation ruined, too. There goes posing in front of beautiful scenery/tourist traps haha! It is truly amazing the things people will say to you. Did anyone ask if you had been beaten? My best friend’s son had 2 club feet when he was born so he had to have surgery and then be in a cast from the waist down for a few weeks. She called me sobbing on more than one occasion because she was out in public and people would come up to her and accuse her of beating her son!! It was truly heartbreaking. She was already so sad to have her baby boy in a cast and have to endure the foot surgeries, and then people accusing her of abuse was just too much. Ugh. People.

      • Oh I’m so sorry to hear about your friends son! I can’t imagine what that must have been like for her! I definitely did get the “who beat you” questions for a while! It was embarrassing to have to answer that, really, it was my own doing and that I should probably consider wearing a helmet with a face mask everywhere I go!

        I hope that you are feeling better! 🙂

  5. I cannot believe the insensitivity of some people! geez. Also, 5 weeks is a long time away. Shoot, Christmas was 5 weeks ago! You have plenty of time for your skin to heal itself & I am CERTAIN that your skin will look fabulous on your wedding day…I just know these things 🙂

    • Amazing, right?

      Okay you just seriously made me smile by telling me that, 5 weeks ago was Christmas and that seems like forever ago!!!! You are right, 5 weeks is plenty of time to heal. I can’t wait to be comfortable and gorgeous on March 9th and this will all be a distant, dreaded memory! Also, I cannot WAIT to see you in 5 weeks!!!!!!!!

  6. Haaahaha your press release is effing fantastic. People can be such dicks. One day, early on in the discovery of my recently acquired allergies, I was wearing white gloves to go from Starbucks (where I had to touch the metal door and I’m so severely allergic to nickel) to my car (where I have to touch my keys that are full of nickel) and it was just easier to leave them on. Well, this small table of high school girls happened to be sitting outside sipping away on their drinks when they decided to stare and point and laugh at my gloves. I had a mixture of embarrassment and anger….. It’s too bad it would have been illegal to duct tape those stupid girls to the local town flagpole so i can point and laugh at THEM. And then walk away. Ideally, it would be snowing on that day as well….

    • haha thank you!!! It was therapeutic to write. Ugh I hate that story about the gloves and nasty teenage girls, hence the reason I wouldn’t go back to high school for $20,000!! Adults can be really mean too (obviously) but for some reason I think high school girls take the cake.

      I like your flag pole idea. If anything like this happens again holler at me and I’ll help you kill them….errr I mean embarrass them. Yeah, embarrass them a lot.

      Do you still have to wear gloves when you come into contact with nickel? It’s amazing the things people can be allergic to!

      • I will totally let you know if they bother me again, lol. And yes, I do still have to wear gloves. I’ve changed the gloves to a bandana that I keep in my pocket now. Much more stylish than white cotton gloves 😉 If I touch nickel to my skin, the skin will bubble. I react to nickel in the same way people react to poison ivy. It’s not pretty. I can’t WAIT to buy a push-button car one day…

      • Oh my goodness!! Wow, this is the first time I’ve heard of such a severe nickel allergy. I can only imagine how CRAZY you felt when you didn’t know about that allergy and what was causing the welts. The bandana does sound stylish, I like it! Probably keeps your hand a lot cleaner than most, too.

        Hmmm I wonder if your medical insurance would cover a new car for allergy reasons? 🙂

  7. I LOVE YOUR LETTER TO PEOPLE! Sooo funny. Sending continuing healing thoughts your way! And also praying this will soon be a distant memory and you’ll have great skin on the day of your wedding! I am going through the exact same thing, not sure if it’s candida die off or what, plus my eyes are tight/puffy/uncomfortable. People are so incredibly insensitive!! I can’t believe what people are saying to you – how rude! This morning I walk in and one of my co-workers peers at my face and says, “Are you feeling okay?” My pat reaction at this point, when people ask this, is to stare at them blankly, and say, “Yes, why?” This immediately makes them uncomfortable and sorry they asked and they begin to stammer, “Well, you look kind of sick… or tired…” Gosh, I can think of some snarky retorts to some of the comments people made to you – for example to the person that said to you “Did you know your face is red” I’d love to say, “Did you know you’re an insensitive a$$hole?” hahaha.

    • Thank you!! I would really love to print it and hand it out to people, but I’ll restrain myself. For now. I appreciate the prayers and healing thoughts, they mean a lot! It is so hard to just be patient sometimes.

      I hate that you’re going through the same thing, ugh!! And it’s funny you say that response, because I’ve thought about doing the same thing! Just cheefully saying “nothing is wrong, why??” Then watching them squirm. Mwahahaha.

      I hope your skin/puffiness starts healing soon- the eye swelling is the worst! It’s hard to go about normal daily functions when you feel like quasimoto.

      Oh and don’t worry, I had plenty of snarky responsees haha! To the girl who said “what’s wrong with your face?” I said “nothing, what’s wrong with yours?” Considering she had a ton of facial scarring from previous acne, she got really baffled and insecure all the sudden. Perfect, lol. If she is going to be rude she’ll get it right back! I fought the urge to say “at least mine will go away” buuuuuut that is just cruel. The thought definitely crossed my mind though!

      I love your comeback to the “did you know your face is red” comment, haha! I could probably come up with a whole slew of “did you know……insert insult about person here.” Sigh, I need to not take it out on people though. Still going to try to show love and compassion to others who simply just don’t understand.

    • Okay so I just had to tell you, this happened this morning:

      student of mine: are you okay?
      me: yeah! why?
      student: umm, you sure?
      me: yeah I’m great, why what’s going on?
      student: you’re all red
      me: oh yeah, I know!
      student: okay (awkwardly walks away) LOL

      Was a pretty effective response. I might keep trying it out.

      • Hahaha!! See, it works! And it isn’t snarky or outright rude, but it always makes me feel better to throw it back in someone’s face and make THEM feel like the awkward one.

        P.s. so does this reaction mean you can’t use ANYTHING on your face at all? Is it dry and red, or just red? I know someone else mentioned vaseline and you said that didn’t work for you – what was bad about it? I’ve been using vaseline too but I dont really think it’s doing too much.

        • It’s VERY dry and red. Like my skin is just sloughing off. I think that may be part of the reason for the pain? The doc said to use cetaphil face moisturizer but I’ve been using this new face cream my mom found. It’s called First Aid Beauty ultra repair face moisturizer. Wen I stopped using the Cerave and started using this my face got a lot better! It’s from sephora.

          What do you use on your face? The Vaseline can be good at times but I’ve also read that using petroleum products on your skin=no good. And it doesn’t really seem to help me at all, just kinda of makes me itchy and greasy haha.

  8. What is wrong with some people? I am sorry you have to deal with that one top of everything else. Sending continued healing thoughts to you.

    Totally random, but I almost used the same featured image of the smileys/frown on my blog today.

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