I always try to find the silver lining in situations no matter how inconvenient or helpless they may seem. Here is tonight’s attempt.

Dear Tamara,

I hate how you make me feel full when I’m not even halfway done with my food. I like how you (usually) keep me from overeating and therefore gaining weight.

I hate how you keep me from working out. I like how you give me an excuse to be lazy.

I hate how you drain my energy. I like the excuse to take lots of naps and watch every imaginable tv series on Netflix.

I hate how you make my belly hurt about 15 days out of the month. I like having an excuse to use a heating pad 15 days out of the month. It’s so warm and cozy mmmmmm.

I hate how big you are. I am thankful that I don’t look pregnant.

I hate how nauseous you make me 24/7. Im glad you don’t give me headaches. Nausea is better than a headache in my book.

I hate how you mess with my hormones. I like the excuse to cry over puppies, sappy commercials, and delicious food.

I hate how I think about you and talk about you way more than I probably should. I’m thankful my friends and family are always there to listen and offer support. I know they’ve GOT to be tired of hearing about it.

I hate how I talk to you/about you like you are a real person. I like referring to you as Tamara. It’s so much prettier than “my hemorrhagic cyst.”

I hate your guts. I’m glad you aren’t permanent.

I wish you didn’t exist. I’m thankful you’re not cancer.