My sleep walking and night terrors generally involve screaming about spiders, home intruders, or the mystery woman who lives under the bed. Sometimes I wake up Isaac just to ask how he is doing, or to see if he needs anything. Rarely do I stray from those topics, but lately sleeping Courtney has been stuck on a new subject.

A few weeks ago I sleepwalked ran into Isaac’s room and told him that I needed help. He asked with what, knowing I was sleep walking, and I said “ummm, errr, uhhhhhh, a bug. Yeah, there’s a bug in my closet you need to kill.” Isaac knows the drill by now. He just has to follow me to said bug and when I try to find the eight-legged monster, it will have mysteriously vanished. Then I wake up, giggle, and go back to bed.

That night, Isaac followed me into my bedroom as he always does. When we got to my closet, I told him that there was no bug, it was a lie. I told him that there was actually a guinea pig in my closet that needed to be killed, but I knew he wouldn’t believe me so I made up the story about the bug.

Isaac’s hysterical laughter woke me up from my sleep walking state almost immediately. He tried to stifle it, but his laugh was the deep kind. The kind that leaves you gasping for air because you can’t believe what someone has just said or done in front of you. When I fully woke up, Isaac told me about the events that had just unfolded. Lying in my sleep to get what I want? That’s pretty…advanced. See mom?! I AM ADVANCED IN SOMETHING!

I went back to sleep and 2 hours later woke up mid-dash to my bathroom. Again, the evil guinea pig was taunting me. He was sitting in my closet hissing at me while I slept, he was a real asshole. I was leaping over my furniture trying to escape his death glare when I woke up and upon realizing what I was doing, burst into hysterical laughter. I laid in bed alone laughing for about 5 minutes straight. Did someone slip some LSD into my dinner and not tell me??

I literally got chills when I saw this picture in Google Images. This is exactly what he looked like. In my dream. Or was it real life?

I dreamed about guinea pigs the next night too, but no sleep walking happened.

Then a few nights ago, I dreamed about another small, furry creature hissing at me. This time, it was a mongoose on top of my curtain rod. Again, I woke up in a panic, running around my room trying to evade the little bastard.

I know what you’re thinking- a MONGOOSE?! Yes, a mongoose. I had to Google it when I woke up to make sure that was the creature I was seeing. I have since confirmed: it was definitely a Mongoose.

Oh how I wish I was still in therapy so I could talk to my counselor about what the heck these dreams mean. I am not afraid of rodents, or any animals at all actually. These little evil furballs have to have some significance, some deeper meaning. I did a quick search into dream meanings online. Here is what I found regarding dreams about Guinea pigs and Mongooses (Mongeese? Mongeeses? Mongise?).

Mongoose: To see a mongoose in your dream suggests that you putting up a defensive wall in an effort to hide your anxieties or shortcomings. You may also be struggling through issues with your sexuality. (awkward)

Guinea Pig: To see a guinea pig in your dream represents your need to be more responsible and attentive. Alternatively, it suggests that through experimentation and taking risks, you learn how and how not to do something. You learn from your mistakes.

These are really interesting interpretations and I’m actually going to do some self reflection to see if I can figure out what they may mean.

And don’t worry husband, I am not realizing that I’m actually a lesbian. Or bi-curious.