Screaming for Smiles

Today I encountered a woman screaming at her children because she wanted to take a photo of them smiling in front of a lake. Her kids were grinning at each other, at passers by, up at the cloudless sky, across the gleaming water– they were smiling at everything except for their mom. In fact, they…

Vow Renewal

An excerpt from the book I’m working on- prose and essays on motherhood. The first timeA short service On a crisp spring dayStars in our eyesPromises on our lipsI doAnd I do, too The second timeA 3-day ceremonySoundtracked by tears and breaths In perfect synchronyWorking to bring our creationEarthside and into our arms The third time Standing in…

Grandpa

This past weekend, on Saturday, August 14th, my grandfather passed away. It’s strange writing this out knowing that his email address is subscribed to my blog, so as soon as I hit “publish”, an inbox that used to belong to my grandpa will get a notification announcing his passing. It’s all just…strange. Two weeks ago,…

Macaroni and Cheese

People talk about the big moments of parenting. The things your spouse will do that make you fall more in or out of love with them as you embark on the daily practice of raising a child together. There are the obvious moments I feel more in love. Watching him cradle our infant just minutes…

The Shore

I don’t recall the last time I laughed so muchOr cared so littleEspecially with spandex coveringOr barely coveringThe softest parts of my body The beach was crowded when we entered the surfBut when we emerged hours laterThe sudden emptiness surrounding us felt disorientingWhere were the sun tents, the castle builders, the couples?Even the seagulls had…

Samuel & Kathryn

Last night my youngest sister, Katy, got married. I am overjoyed, proud, emotional, and in awe. Legally, she has been an adult for five years, but in my mind she is still eight years old. YES she can drink, YES she has graduated from college, and YES she pays bills and has a job, but she’s only eight. Trust…

Replacing Empathy With Superiority

A trending news story right now is a tragic one, as most seem to be these days. In Cincinnati, a 4-year old boy fell into a gorilla enclosure at the zoo, and after being dragged around by the 400-pound gorilla for 10 minutes, the zoo made the decision to shoot and kill him. The gorilla, not…

I Thought You Were Dead

Twenty minutes Waiting and pacing Tears Worst fears I thought you were dead The story, it broke in synch with my heart News from afar, a tragic loss by far The words jumped from the page, coiled around my neck constricting my breathing I’m a complete wreck Plane crash Afghanistan 14 dead Your company Its name There in bold on…

Dumbing Down The Smartphone

About once per year, I get an overwhelming desire to disconnect from social media (blog posts don’t count as social media, right? Right.) I get cranky when scrolling through Facebook, yet I can’t stop scrolling through Facebook. But it’s not so much a Facebook addiction as an iPhone addiction– I just want to be doing something on my phone. Like…