Over the course of our lives, we are constantly evolving both physically and mentally. I have always been amazed at the process that takes place in the early stages of childhood development up through adulthood, and how the brain grows and learns. Amidst all of these incredible changes, one thing seems to remain the same: girls are generally terrible people.
One of my favorite comedians, Louis C.K., sums it up perfectly (I have cleaned up the language):
“Here’s the difference, to me, between boys and girls: Boys mess things up; Girls are messed up. That’s the difference. And it becomes the difference between men and women, really. A man will, like, steal your car or burn your house down or beat the crap out of you, but a woman will ruin your freaking life. Do you see the difference? Like, a man will cut your arm off and throw it in a river, but he’ll leave you as a human being intact. He won’t mess with who you are. Women are nonviolent, but they will crap inside of your heart.”
Yes Louis, you are correct. Men will break things, both hearts and inanimate objects, but women? Women will destroy hopes, dreams, dignity, self confidence, and crush souls. A woman knows exactly where to press to hurt the most. She knows the exact second that the most damage can be inflicted on her victim, and goes in for the kill. It is a gift that we are born with.
It starts on the playground, little Sally terrorizing Jessica because she has pretty hair, and it continues on through adulthood. Where do we get off trampling other women to make ourselves look better? You know what actually looks better? Being yourself, taking ownership for your faults, and not putting others down to get ahead.
Did we used to be sweet little innocent girls until somebody came along and taught us how to be nasty and conniving? Is there some primal reason that women are catty? Perhaps it helped our great great great great ancestors who were living in caves and hunting for food. No? I didn’t think so either.
I am hoping that my awareness of how awful girls can be will help me to be a better woman. I know that because of my gender, I am more susceptible to gossiping, eye rolling, and unexplained fits of rage.
Not all women are catty and back stabbing, and for that I am grateful. What I need to do now is quit being so surprised when a grown woman channels her inner “mean girl” or “middle school bully” and learn to let it go. I don’t have to confront or fight every person who wrongs a loved one or myself, as satisfying as it may be. Mean people will get what is coming to them, they always do.
I still remember the first talk I received about the mean nature of girls from my mother in the third grade. I think that the passive aggressiveness that many girls (including myself occasionally) is the scariest trait. You really never know what they’re thinking.
I think you are exactly right. I am guilty of it too, sometimes! Not letting people know exactly how I feel up front. I’m trying to work on it, but you are exactly right, it’s scary! 😦
I so wish I could shield my kids from the inevitable harm that will come to them in middle school and high school. The world today scares me to death!
I agree with you on that one. Thinking back to my middle/high school days makes me shudder, I wouldn’t go back for anything! I wish your kids the best of luck! I’m sure you will get them through it. I know I couldn’t have done it without the support from my mom!